Jeff Van Gundy Is Trying To Be Jon Gruden: Be A Bad Color Commentator

Watching the Lakers/Celtics game on ABC and Van Gundy is trying to over take Jon Gruden in the "I love everyone" color commentating style, perhaps in hopes of getting a new coaching job. He just said Kendrick Perkins and Andrew Bynum both would have "legit beef" for not being selected to the All Star Game, when neither of them would deserve to go. He also said Jamal Crawford should've gotten selected as a reserve. If you want to make an argument that Crawford would be more deserving than say, Allen Iverson, then you have a point. Then again, Joakim Noah, David Lee, and John Wall deserve to go the All Star Game ahead of Iverson. Too bad the All Star Game isn't for one dimensional sixth men though and Crawford also has a teammate (Josh Smith) that isn't going that would deserve it over him.

Paul Shirley Writes An Offensive Blog Post About Haiti, Is More Famous Than He Ever Was Playing Basketball

For those that don't know who Paul Shirley is, and unless you are a hardcore NBA fan or a fan of the few NBA teams he played for (in my case I did know who he was, being a fan of the Bulls) you probably don't. But apparently he wrote a blog about how he's not donating to Haiti. Of course that on it's own isn't offensive, but he basically said what happened to Haiti was their own fault and told the people to "wear a condom once in a while". He was a contributor to ESPN.com, and they promptly fired him. Maybe this was a designed PR stunt from Shirley, after all he was never going to get this much publicity from being a basketball player. Any guesses for his next column? Katrina, A Look Back: We Should've Let New Orleans Fend For Themselves.

Back And Better Like Jesus

I originally stopped doing this blog because it had strayed away from what I intended it to be, which was a satirical look at sports all the while talking about stuff you won't hear from the Booyah Network and perhaps being a little (or a lot) snarky when doing all of it. Of course this is really no different than the numerous other blogs in the sports blogging community, but everyone has their own sense of humor, I felt I could bring my own individual feel to it. So now No Shark Attacks is back, reborn like that Jesus fellow once was and ready to do it all again. And what better time to do it when the athlete that inspired this blog in the first place is back to making headlines? I thought of changing the title of the blog to "Guns in the Locker Room", but I wasn't feeling it. Hopefully this goes better than other people's second attempts such as Ditka's tenure with the Saints. At least I don't have any draft picks to trade away.